everything that is happening has already happened

Becka, I was walking with Thomas the other day, wondering how in the world six more pounds of baby and more blood and more life would ever fit in this belly of mine, knowing there’s nowhere to go but out, already feeling to cramped and crowded in my own skin, and I remembered you writing the same thing while pregnant with E.
Funny how the second makes you feel so much more full than the first.

Old wives tales are all saying “girl, girl, girl.” My son tells me it’s a girl. My friends. My mother-in-law. They point out my moods. They tactfully do not mention the way my hips and rear end have transformed, the fact that I don’t seem to be nearly as “glowing” this time around. The heart rate is quick (more girl signs).

Heart burn. Chocolate cravings. A little body that thumps and shifts so much. I remember Thomas stretching, but slowly, and not so frequently. A fighter. A fierce one. Mina. A quick baby name meaning search gives me this:
‘Means “love” in German.
In Persian it means “blue jewel/gem.”
In Japanese it means south.
Means “fish” in Sanskrit. This is the name of the daughter of the Hindu goddess Usha as well as the daughter of the god Kubera.
Its English meaning is “Strong willed warrior”‘

My lovely blue gem. My warrior from the south.
My mermaid. A selkie? A naiad? A berehynia? A siren? An ondine? All of these tricksy watery spirits.
But Aries is a sun sign.
Little one, who are you?

I will be 28 years old in six days. Another birthday. Another year. Reaching toward 30. Babies trailing behind me.

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